Tuesday, January 15, 2013

He Lost Her Fortune

He married her for her money but ended up falling in love with her.  She had a huge fortune that he invested.  He lost it all, thus losing Downton Abbey, her home.  In a moving scene, he admitted to her his failure.  She came over to him, knelt in front of him, smiled at him, and used her words simply to encourage him...

If this happened today, many women in the church would tell her to leave him or call the elders in the church to come and rebuke him.  They would tell her to use "tough love" and not put up with that kind of behavior.

I don't read anywhere in the Bible where wives are encouraged to take their husband's shortcomings {or sins} to the elders in the church, use "tough love", or leave him when the going gets tough.  

Instead, I read in I Peter 2 how Jesus suffered and then chapter 3 begins, "Likewise, you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands  that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation {lifestyle} of the wives."

Just as Jesus suffered "leaving us an example, that you should follow his steps" {I Peter 2:21}, we may suffer in our marriages.  Your husband may be addicted to porn, alcohol, or video games.  He may be lazy and not work much.  {Remember, a nagging, complaining, or controlling wife is just as destructive to a marriage.} There are many ways wives suffer in their marriages "but if, when you do well, and suffer for it, you take it patiently, this is acceptable with God." {I Peter 2:20}

If you do leave him, take "tough love" action, or call the elders, you may humiliate him and push him away completely with maybe no hope of salvation for him.    We are absolutely called to suffer for the cause of Christ.  Is it easy?  No, it is difficult but we will be rewarded.  God promises us this. 

Confront him in his shortcomings and sin, then leave it in the hands of your loving Father.  He will do a much better job convicting and changing your husband than you can ever do.

If your husband is physically abusing you, call the authorities and have them deal with him.  Then pray for him consistently.  I know this isn't "politically correct" advice, but it is how I interpret Scripture and God has NEVER led me astray.

I have witnessed many women that I have mentored in desperate situations, even husbands who were having affairs, save their marriages through this counsel.  God's ways work.  Man's way usually don't.

Wise Women